What we do with grief and loss


Physically I can recall the relief when my vet said: NOT TODAY. Most of us have been there at least once. We have thought the worst, expected it, braced for it with a short contingency plan including 2 days off and a gallon of Haggen Daas. So when the words NOT TODAY come; our world and its choices change. But what about Plan B? Where do we go with shock and dis-belief? Does it overwhelm us? For how long? To what deep effect? How are THE OTHERS going to be impacted? The kids? The other animals? What will I do with the handmade Christmas stocking – replete with matching hat for at least one photo a year? What will I do with that? That loss. That forever… that nothing can replace.

Within hours or in a few days, each of us begins with the doubts. Even when it is 100% the right decision, then and now – doubt creeps in. But here’s the deal = don’t let it stay. When I’m negative, angry or confused; I remember what a wise person once told me: “…grant that negative person, scary place, or sad thing safe passage through your mind.” Don’t hang on. Don’t give in. Don’t give it more power. Don’t hold your breath. Breathe. Remember. Enjoy. And look for someone else to love.