Spoiler Alert - I got bit.


Yup. Bit. And NOPE - did not believe it would happen. However, looking back with 20/20 hindsight, all the signs and signals were blatant. 

Here is the short version: I messed up! I did not listen. To the Dog nor to myself. I listened to the owner and relied on her to tell me the truth and guide me through this introduction. YES, I know better but, the way she appealed to my sympathies; I believed her. That was my first mistake. 

#2 mistake = I painted all the red flags green. I went against my GUT instincts. I ignored all my previous experiences dealing with unpredictable Dogs and I paid dearly.

Even before our first meet 'n' greet the owner had so many rules I had to take notes while muttering to myself: "Doesn't she know who I am? What I have done? Who I know? WTH?" 

When I did meet them, they were waiting on the sidewalk in front of their house and she repeated: No eye contact. Move slowly. Pick up the treat bag I left you on the ground. Wait until we have walked 20 feet away then fetch it. Yes, she did. Yes, I did. 

My hackles were up and not only from being pissy about the owner - the Dog gave me the creeps. I turtled in my head to my shoulders. I was not breathing normal. My guts were sour. And I barely heard her as she bleated: TOSS HER TREATS.

I asked why. Wrong question. Just do it and she will calm down.

Let me cut to the chase, I got bit. Not then and there - it was on my second visit. Don't scoff - you would have gone back too. Ya' know why? I felt sorry for them both. She was so over her head with this Dog and had not been away from her for almost 2 years. Not once for more than 4 hours. And now she had a new job requiring travel. She was screwed. With my cape and tiara in place; I arrived to help. 

Second visit instructions included: Don't touch her. Toss treats. I left you 2 bags. Sit on that tall chair over there against the wall. SHE and I will go sit on HER couch because SHE feels safe there.

Within 2 minutes, the owner stood up to go to the refrigerator. Now, with the owner's back to us, the Dog looked at me differently. She was looking me straight in the eye, her body got low and slow. Action was soon to follow. And it did. In a flash.

My brain was firing on all cylinders and before I could make any actual decision - I just started yelling in a deep voice. Then without any prior warning nor permission - my body turned to the side while I lifted my knee up high and pulled it over my stomach. The Dog lunged and bit the outside of my knee. 

After I felt the bee sting bite and only then, did I remember the cold frozen eyes and the fully exposed upper teeth getting closer, larger, and higher because the Dog's body was by then in mid-air less than an arms length away. The mind is SUCH A COOL THING!! But ya know what - the guts are even cooler. And this physical action of covering my vital organs and hunching up my shoulders to protect my neck was the epitome of a GUT REACTION.

My biggest mistake? I should have listened to and acted upon MY GUT INSTINCTS in the first place rather than intellectualizing, rationalizing, and feeling superior to my ancestor's guidance. Ignoring my body's defense system and wasting valuable time waiting for my brain to make an "intelligent" decision was unwise. The Dog listened to his ancestors and immediately obeyed. Me? I let my brain do the flattering homocentric talking (AND LISTENING) until it was too late. I got bit.