The Story of Colonel Squeeek

I can't make this s**t up.

Matter of fact, I have always found truth to be much more entertaining than the best written fiction. Matter in point: Colonel Squeeek. Yes, that is 3 E’s and he earned them, as well as his rank of Colonel but that story is not why we are here. Today, I want to talk about perceptual blindness and the “Ships Not Seen Phenomena.” It is real and in my world of animal and human behavior; I get to see this manifested almost on a daily basis.

Simply explained: One who cannot see something never before seen… like a miracle, an aberration, or the ships of Christopher Columbus. One source offers this explanation:  Native Americans could “not see the ships” of Christopher Columbus enter in the harbor, even though they were in plain sight, supposedly, because the Native Americans never having seen ships of this magnitude did not have the proper mental slots or receptors to process or accept such foreign or rather never before seen views.

Truly, I do see this as I watch people who cannot accept what they just witnessed in their own animals right in front of them after using a Flower Essence blend even tho they see their dog who has been spinning for years suddenly stops. A Cat who howls 24/7 stops. A horse who is an angry head tosser stops. A shy dog makes eye contact for the first time ever. People don’t see the event; they don’t believe it.

Back to The Squeeek Phenomena. This amazingly smart albeit clever Siamese-ish Cat had not been around for a while and when he was quiet, trouble often followed in the manner of faucets turned on, dresser drawers rifled, doors opened… so I went to check. There he was but I did not seee him. Yes, 3 E’s. He was on the toilet. Front paws at 10:00 and 2:00. Hindquarters squatting down dead center over the water. He had a dreamy gaze as he stared forward at the bathroom cabinetry.

I saw it all and yet, truthfully, did not see a thing. Nothing. Nothing registered. My brain and body were frozen as I stared at my Cat taking a dump in the toilet.

What did I do? I did what most people would do. I yelled breaking his blissful trance. And why did I do this? No clue. There was not a thought in my brain. None. Regrets? Tons. What fun I missed out on. The stories of how the fantastic Cat Whisperer, Meg, talked her Cat into using the toilet. Flush and all. What a fool for caving (even though it was without my permission) to my first action, re-action of dis-counting, doubting, not believing what I was seeing!

I apologized profusely but it was too late for him. He had been shocked by my insolence. My punishment was swift and severe because forever after this date, he ignored the toilet and often the litter box as well.

Thinking back, I believe Colonel Squeeek had 3 possible reasons for performing this never-before-seen phenomena. First, to show off his supreme intellect. Second, to avoid the indignity of the litter box. Third and most likely the truth – to exact his revenge on the Dogs by purposefully and forever corrupting their favorite watering hole.


-Meg Harrison